The Look Of A Man Who Knows

That He Is Having The Piss Taken Out Of Him.

(click it to see his eyes more clearly)

Yoo - Hoo?!!!

I recently found myself in the situation of referencing 'the gay handkerchief code' as if it was the most basic part of common knowledge there is. Not only did I quickly find out that no one knew what the fuck I was talking about, but also that I didn't really know much more than what I'd read on Popbitch once about someone from Ultravox or something inadvertantly getting pissed on in a club because of his visible hanky.

This website is certainly one of the most conclusive dictionaries of hanky ettiquette I've ever come across (no pun intended - lol!!).

Turns out when people describe gays as being "good with colours", they really mean it. Who can tell the difference between orange, apricot, coral and gold lame in a dark club?? I suppose when it's the difference between telling the world you're not interested in any attention, or having a fat guy sit on your face, you'd probably learn pretty quickly.

The main thing to learn from this is never to wear a dark red hanky on your right side, unless you really want some guy to ram two fists up your arsehole.

Punters say the funniest things

PunterNet UK is a lovely place where sordid tawdry little men can go and exchange reviews of their experiences with escorts, hookers and massasge parlours. It is crushingly grim, but also mind bendingly fascinating.There were, at the time of my writing this, 83925 'field reports' - these are where the fun is at. This: "I really enjoyed my time with Sophia. After an incredible back massage(those long nails are so teasing) I turned over and it wasn’t long before she had me in her mouth uncovered which was great to experience again after such a long time" is about Sophia of Oswestry.

Pick a Part Thats Roo

Now Wayne Rooney can do just about anything in my book, if he wants to shag old age prostitutes that's cool with me as long as he never loses weight/shaves/does a Ronaldo.
I was going to say that I draw the line at him getting the title of a Stereophonics album tattooed on his forearm but fuck it, if you're going to get a bad tattoo at least get the worst fucking tattoo you can.





He also has the word 'then' tattooed on his back while a friend has 'ok' on theirs in memory of a hilarious saying from their childhood.

Heroes

mmmm let me feast on your tears...

A bit OTT

This little charmer has been posting videos on youtube boasting about having 'possed-up' 1,500 girls. Not only is this rather unpleasant, but I must say that I find it hard to believe anyone like this could have run 1,500 girls. Thats a girl every night of the year for just under 5 years.

Find out more from those chaps at the Sun.

Worst Case Scenario

THAT is why most rapists tend to pick obscure occupations outside the public eye; nightshift workers, long distance lorry drivers, glam rock superstars...