Monday, 22 September 2008

Knife Crime Update: Police Intimidation

Making the Police uniform more overtly aggressive, by dressing them up as Stormtroopers with combat trousers, big lace-up boots and a gun, is a dangerous game. Sure, it scares fassies like me, but then I don’t really break the law anyway…. But for the hardened criminals and hoodies it’s really aimed, it really only ups the ante in the aggression stakes and probably makes them more excited about the prospect of shanking an alpha male cop.

The way to tackle this is the make the most of the only guys who are still truly intimidating these days, but not in a particularly violent way, i.e. those huge hairy, beefcake, raving homosexuals you see with nipple clamps and vests around Vauxhall or on flyers for gay sex shops in Soho. I think this new tack of enforcing police control through utilizing the latent homophobia in everyone is possibly one of the most psychologically advanced ideas ever to have been exhibited by a policeforce. I can’t imagine anything else so guaranteed to paralyse a rudeboy with fear than the vision of a softly-spoken, near naked man, wearing big leather pants, stroking a truncheon advancing upon them at 2 in the morning. This policeman on Regent Street was so intimidating that no one would come near him. Not even cars. What a well engineered plan.

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