Saturday, 22 November 2008

Oi, Bandage! Up Yours!

My housemate is a recording artist and she sometimes records in studios that other recording artists have been recording in immediately before her. Just recently she was putting the finishing touches to something or other at a studio where a popular "dance-rock" act had been doing the same thing and she noticed lots of scissors and bandages lying around the place. She asked someone what it was, and apparently the bandages are these new army issue morphine soaked things that get you totally high if you put them on, but then as soon as you take them off you stop being high immediately with no comedown. This is surely the perfect drug. You could drive to the woods, stick your bandage on and have a lovely dreamy time with your buddies and feel like you're in a big hug etc etc and then take it off, get back in the car, drive back to town and get straight on with the brain surgery/criminal defence/childcare or whatever it is you need to do sober to get paid. I'd be willing to break my four months of sobriety to try this out, if anyone wants to get hold of some for me.

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